"How would this happen?"
"Birds and the bees and the monkey babies, Mulder."

I don't care how the hell it happened, but I wish it would happen
a whole lot more often. Deep in the dreary and dire tail end of this
season of bees, brain cancer, and bleeding tattoos we have been given
a gift sorely missed this season by writer Vince Gilligan - a Darin
Morgan episode. Darin may have left us this year, but Vince figured
out a way to bring him back as an actor (and he does a great job of
playing this loser with the ability to "make faces") in this wickedly
funny classic episode of The X-Files. A true gem on the show's writing
staff with a knack for knowing just how to involve Mulder & Scully in
the story, Vince has proven himself as adept at writing a story that
has us rolling in laughter as those that tear at your heart. I also
have to thank Mr. Gilligan for once again giving a nod to continuity
and actually having Mulder and Scully acknowledge that they have seen
this morphing ability before instead of just ignoring that fact as they
so often do.

I'm glad that Vince remembered that Mulder isn't the only funny one
too - one of the things I always enjoy is the opportunity for Scully
to show a sense of humor. Her chiding of Mulder (starting in the car
with "So, uh, so what else about this interests you? Could it be ..
uhhhh... visitors from space?") and her ability to rattle off a Mulder
theory as good as he can ("Scully, should we be picking out china
patterns or what?") were a welcome treat. However, this show is clearly
Duchovny's and boy does he run with it. From the moment Faux Mulder
stuck his head out of the bathroom and said "It's a clear" what was
clear is that we were in for a treat. 

Given only a tie to tell them apart, Duchovny expertly creates Eddie
as Faux Mulder. It is a delightful discovery when the audience first
realizes what is going on (though on second viewing it is clear from 
the moment "Mulder" enters the girl's room that it is indeed Eddie).
So while the real Mulder is busy breaking the tail off of Scully's
little science experiment and planning a quick exit before she can
notice, Faux Mulder is running around with a truly dorky picture of
himself hoping his high school sweetheart would admit he wasn't a
total dweeb. As Faux Mulder leaves Real Mulder locked in a hole with
a Perk Cola, sandwich, and an apple the real fun begins. He whines
"I'm sorry", closes the case, and tries his best to impersonate an
FBI agent (even if he can't spell it). In Skinner's office you see
him trying to mimic Scully's posture and then he awkwardly taps her
on the shoulder as he begins his plan.

The office scene and the scene at Mulder's apartment were truly
something. There were fish in the fish tank for a change and even
Faux Mulder wondered "Where the hell do I sleep?" From bad basketball
batting to cheese steak loving geeks for friends and a porno hot line
that calls him (more continuity using the Marty Mulder alias he used
in "3" - thanks again Vince) I was laughing all the way. Scully's not
the only one with no life in this duo, and Eddie is right - they both
need to live a little.

Director Cliff Bole had a successful outing for his first episode
with the show, and the supporting performances were just plain fun.
I especially enjoyed Christine Cavenaugh's whacked out Star Wars
groupie, Amanda Nelligan - her scenes were laughing out loud funny.
Though she is famous for her voice work I think this shows that she
ought to get time in front of the camera more often. The initial
interview with her was hilarious as Mulder bails right after she
started singing and Scully can barely contain herself at the ludicrous
nature of the case.

Okay, sports fans time to talk about "The Scene". I've got to admit,
though I found it quite entertaining to watch I was left with feeling
"Poor Scully" at the end. I think the question of whether or not
Scully has ever entertained unpartnerlike thoughts about Mulder
has been pretty much answered. Kudos to Gillian Anderson for playing
this all so very believably. Our girl Scully has yet another exciting
Friday night planned for herself -now that she no longer has a dog to
wash she is torn between the thrill of finishing her monograph for
"Penology Review" on that riveting topic of "Diminished Acetylcholine
Production in Recidivist Offenders" or pouring over autopsy results
of a quicklimed monkey man. So Casual!Scully sits alone when Faux
Mulder shows up bottle of wine in hand sporting a goofy grin. Scully
is immediately wary,sure something is wrong, but goes with it giving
Mulder curious sidelong glances as she opens the wine. Eddie Van Blundht
was right when he said "maybe I got personality" - what he has figured
out is how to master these situations and give women what they want.
I bet Scully has wanted to "really talk" to Mulder for a long long time,
so a bottle of wine, firelight, romantic music, a little bonding with a
pumper-truck prom story, and three shakes of a monkey-man's tail later
Scully is perhaps thinking that she's only had two bad dates in four
years and she's only got so long to live, so what the hell - why not.
The vulnerable way she quietly says "I like it" and that beautiful
moment of realization Gillian gives us as Scully watches the Mighty
Morphin Panty Raider * move in for the kiss complete with a soft
nervous sigh was wonderfully done. Like I said, poor Scully. Oh well,
Action!Mulder is there to break up the party and the door (does he not
have a key?) so all that is sacred is safe in X-Files land. No kiss,
but UST for miles. Mulder and Scully are back to not "really" talking
until Mulder, while not a loser according to Scully, can perhaps find
a little bit of Eddie in himself.

*As much as I'd like to take credit for Mighty Morphin Panty Raider,
I must thank Sister Nina the Remotely Plausible for coining that one.

Random Musings
-------------------------
-Retreads (and there were lots): The black nurse was the maid in "Our
Town" and a train clerk in "Nisei". The Doctor with the PCRs was one
of the evil PTA members in "Die Hand" and also in "Born Again" as the
little girl's doctor. The security guard wearing his pants around his
ankles could be seen in "Blessing Way", and of course, not that you'd
recognize him, but Darin Morgan was the flukeman from "The Host" under
all that latex.

-X-Files once again concocts its favorite tabloid "The World Weekly
Informer" - and in addition to that great "Monkey Babies Invade Small
Town ... Did West Virginia Women Mate With Visitors From Space?"
headline and classic photo we had "Michael Jackson Held Captive By
Exotic Pets", "ETAP Bigshot Busted" (which I would assume was a joke
at one of the show's cameramen or cinematographers), and last but not
least an exclusive by the Stupendous Yappi.

-Hmmm. So just what was about to happen on good little catholic girl
Scully's prom date when the sirens started going off? After all Marcus
was the 12th grade love of her life...

-So how does one become impregnated by Luke Skywalker?  "He dropped
by my apartment one day and one thing sort of lead to another..." -
Sounds like standard moves for Eddie. Could've been Scully saying this.

-Nice to have an episode chock full of *plausible* Scully Rational
Explanations (SREs) - she was doing all the medical grunt work to
solve this right along with Mulder, and her explanations of events
were logical and possible. The Rohypnol rape and the medial reasons
for the tails were both quite good.

-I don't know if Scully's wearing shorter heels these days, or if it
was just all the walking shots, but the height difference was really
apparent this episode - perhaps highlighted by Duchovny having to
bend himself awkwardly to even fit under that umbrella.

-Speaking of the umbrella, the weather sure did change from the rainy
car to the porch where the sun shines brightly.

-I loved the way the silent "H" fell off the side of the house when
Mulder & Scully were at the door.

-Yet another great moment. Mulder opening a door to large crashing
and clanging then yelling "I'm alright". Scully: "What?"

-That was a heck of a flying tackle and a great slide attached to
snag the perp by Action!Mulder.

-So did this thing get a TV-14 just for a few swear words and a
plumber's butt scene? That's pretty mystifying to me.

-It's funny the games they play to amuse themselves, but really...
Eleanor Roosevelt? Mulder was right to amend the rules after that
one.

-It's no wonder Eddie turned out so strange - just look at his house.
Dad the Monkey Man on the wall. Old copies of Glimpse magazine with
"The Tale of a Tail" stacked around, TVs on top of TVs, and velour
lamp shades for crying out loud.

-Ah, a pathologist and her power tools - plus yet another entry in
the Scully fashion headgear for autopsies. 

-A headline from Mulder's wall: "Dead Horse Riddle Sparks UFO Buffs".

-We finally have an address for Mulder: 42-2630 Hegal Place, Alexandria,
VA 23242. And we know his driver's license will expire 3-31-99. 

-The last shot shows someone swabbing the floors wearing the same
outfit we just saw Eddie in... hmmm...

Autumn
"Did he have a light saber?"